baked

It started with boysenberry pie. Then brioche rolls. And especially the cinnamon bread. Her hands...how they so easily moved with grace, precision and the perfect amount of recklessness. My grandfather was an artist. He painted. My grandmother was an artist. She baked. In the kitchen, she moved effortlessly and without a recipe in hand, she knew exactly what to do. Once her baked goods made their debut from the oven browned, sugared and risen to perfection, our mouths watered until they were cool enough to savor their goodness.

One summer before she passed, I made the drive to Fresno to learn how to make her pies. Her boysenberry pie was my favorite. We would always take a few frozen home with us to bake throughout the year. And oh how I licked each plate clean. Truly the best pie ever. She showed me how to make the perfect crust and I watched in awe how she could measure exactly one cup of flour in the palm of her hand. I forced her to pour the flour in a measuring cup because I didn't believer her at first. Sure enough, exactly one cup. (I'm still trying to master this, I figure it must take a life time.)

It was watching her and most likely tasting her dishes growing up that instilled in me a love to bake. I simply can't go a week without making some sort of dessert, dinner or breakfast in the oven. And I love it. I love the feeling that I inherited a desire to bake the way she did. I love being covered in flour and sugar and of course, licking the mixing bowl clean. I love sharing my love through baking too. Just like her. I still feel a sense of home, warmth and love whenever I make her dishes. And I hope one day people will feel that way too when I share one of my dishes with them.

This Christmas I made her brioche rolls for the first time. They turned out almost as delicious as hers. Brioche are fairly easy to make as long as you have patience. They take 11 hours to make, but are well worth the wait.




Thanks Grandma!

merry christmas

The presents were wrapped all under the tree, the table was set with genuine care and the ham in the oven filled the air sweetly while sugar cookies were frosted and sampled greedily. Christmas day was filled with family, love and good food. 

I hope you had a wonderful Christmas time as well filled with sugarplums and friendly gatherings! 

Merry Christmas!

This is Sabrina. She says Merry Christmas too.

flat land, illinois

I wish I was here today. Peaceful. Calm. Gray.

Lovely. Even with my cold sniffles. 

breathe

I stepped outside the classroom door and slowly took another step forward breathing in. A breath that felt like my first in four months. A breath that felt like relief. It was a relief. It reminded me of stepping off a plane at the Long Beach airport into open air. Fresh, movable air. I felt movable. 

The past four months were a flurry of nervous questions, late night cups of coffee and stress. Now, it wasn't all that bad. In fact, it was fun. It was exciting to be back in a classroom and I now have 30 or so more people to love. And people who love me. And have loved me, well. 

Monday afternoon, I handed in my final exam, walked outside and chatted with now friends and approximately five minutes into the conversation exclaimed, "we can drink again!" I completed my first semester of graduate school at the Institute for Spiritual Formation, something I wasn't sure I could do four months ago. And after looking into my heart for four months, digging around and surfacing unknown thoughts and feelings, I could use a drink...or two (maybe not three) while off contract. 

Working full time and going to school is hard. Something seemingly obvious and known before I entered the semester, but I think I was a bit surprised. And I was more open. It wasn't like senior year when I was well over my head, but could be a 'survivor' (to an extent). Being in ISF is almost a calling to not be a 'survivor.' I was required to sit with God and think about my heart and life, something I desperately wanted and yet was sometimes so difficult. 

I am extremely thankful for this last semester. I never thought of myself as 'protected' in life. But I now more than ever realize how much God, not anyone else, but how God protected me growing up. And even how He was gentle with me this semester. I am the woman I am today solely because of Him and couldn't be more thankful.

I will breathe a little lighter through Christmas without the burden of prayer projects and books and working extra hours to make up for class time, but with a heavy knowledge of how much I owe, a good knowledge, one that I want to continue to learn to breathe with and for.  

cabbage

I feel like this today. A little fuzzy. Perhaps a little blurry even. Hoping my cold will magically disappear over night...

 

But Happy Rain! You, please stay. 

quoted

This may be completely self-serving, but I thought it was a bit fun when I googled my name tonight (admit it, you've done this before too) to see that I was a "Quote of the Moment" on this person's blog. Although, I do owe the fact that I was quoted at all to my friend, Brett, due to his article, Short Attention Span Faith, published in Relevant's September issue. I'm glad someone thinks I have something intelligent to contribute to this changing world. I'm usually quoting others in my own articles. :)

And for more fun, I was quoted as Biola's spokeswoman in this article published Saturday. Too funny. And since posts are always better with pictures, here is one of Wheaton's chapel, Brett's alma mater, from my trip to Illinois.

(You should definitely check out Brett's most recent post on hipster Christmas gifts...even if you have no hipster friends to buy for, the list is most entertaining.)

quarry imperfection

I have a love for imperfection. I like when things look a little handmade and when the flaw in something is actually why you love it. In actuality, imperfection actually resolves into perfection. It's really a choice of the mind, because when they meet in the middle, it's quite beautiful.

When I was in Illinois, Megan took me to the quarry. I say "the" because it is rightfully that wonderful and special. Here are some perfectly imperfect photos from our time there.

family

With Thanksgiving passed, I want to say I am thankful for family. I have been blessed with grandparents who live across the street and aunts and uncles who I grew up with taking me out on dates. I may say I wish I had a big family, but truly I wouldn't trade my family for the world. I am lucky we are small enough to be close and big enough to fill a dining table. And Thanksgiving only reinforced my love for them and family gatherings.

Here are a few photos from our fun Thanksgiving.

 

Half the spread...
My parents destuffing and carving the Turkey.
"The kids" chipping in on helping with the dishes.
My grandmere and I. I can't tell you how much I love her. 

photo of the day

So I've never done a photo of the day before, but I really wanted to post one today. This is one of my favorites from Chicago. I don't even know why I love it so much, but to me it's very prettiful. And yes, I am well aware that is not a word. :)

Have a lovely day!

out of town...

The last few weeks were a bit of a daze and I finally have landed back on my feet after giving myself a few nights of rest this week. But in more exciting news, the reason they were a daze was because I was out of town, first for my ISF retreat which I hope to write more about and second — I went on vacation! Better yet, I went to Chicago and visited one of my best friends. Here's a photo teaser, and I'll be back with more to say, especially in photos.

the cake

My Dad turned 60 years old on Halloween. He doesn't act or look like a sixty year-old in my opinion, but I knew he should at least have the kind of cake grand enough for a sixtieth year birthday, so I searched and Deb from Smitten Kitchen as usual had the perfect cake - Chocolate Butter Cake with Raspberry Filling and Bittersweet Brandied Ganache. If your mouth isn't watering already, here are some delicious photos of the baking process and finished highly acclaimed (by birthday party attendees & my Dad himself) finished product, pretty much the best chocolate cake I've tasted in a long time.



I affectionately call this cake dust, which often occurs when you press mix without patting the flour, sugar down a bit. Oops.


The recipe called for a cup of freshly brewed coffee so of course I used it as an excuse to go to Starbucks - a cup for the cake & a cup for me.






So I really wanted to decorate the cake, but I began to run out of time and my attempt to move the cake from my "frosting board" to cake platter wasn't looking too successful so I ended up just decorating the frosting board. Good learning experience?!?

oh my starbucks

And the holiday season has officially begun. Starbucks Christmas cups are out and I was overjoyed when I got mine this morning. Lovely red cup, how I love you. And the theme this year, Wish, is quite bright and nice.

portraiture

My dear photographer friend Lehua lovingly spent an entire day with my family a few weeks ago. It was my grandmere's birthday and I wouldn't dare show you the last portraits my cousin and I took for her (years ago), so we decided upon the perfect gift: cousin portraits for her, new ones where we are not wearing pink, fluffy dresses.

Lehua is not only a wonderful friend to me, but an extremely talented photographer/artist and I'm not going to lie, she had some tough subjects. My cousin is a little camera shy and I'm not exactly photogenic, but Lehua did an amazing job and I know my Grandmere will love the photos. Here are a few, but sneak over to her blog to see more and check out her other work.





we walked around the tide pools for a bit. im really just a kid at heart. i love sea anenomes.







I highly recommend Lehua for any event, wedding or portrait session!

the haunted victorian

Excitement, costumes, crisp air, sweets and becoming someone else. Halloween isn't simply about hallows' eve and ghouls and goblins, it's a day everyone in the world can be whoever they choose. I love almost every holiday, but Halloween always brings so much joy and excitement to me, ironically, considering the holiday should probably evoke fear or eeriness.

A weekend ago, my good friend Nicole invited a few of us to her house transformed into the Haunted Victorian for a night of chic halloween fun. It was a fun night of celebration, spooky in its own right and definitely chic.


Faith lighting the candles. Nicole actually glued the rhinestones onto the pumpkin in a pattern. Talented? Yes.



Ronalynn took the last photo of me, which I subsequently stole from Facebook. (Thank you Ronalynn!) Do I pass for an Audrey Hepburn?

rain

It rained today. Little drops fell from the sky and it made my heart happy. I woke up to the repetitive droplets sounding off in our courtyard pond. My roommates had left for work and I jumped out of bed and opened the curtains. Sigh. 

There is something so comforting by the soft sound the rain makes when you are inside a building letting you know it's still there. And something enrapturing about the loud rhythm the water creates as it hits pavement. 

I couldn't stop smiling today. The rain enclosed my heart and despite the cold, I was very warm. 

*photo from my Maryland trip

boats and boats

Before summer officially ended, there was one last happening needed to be had. The weekend before last, before the official start of Fall, my Dad and I set sails (figuratively, since we no longer sail over) and spent a weekend in Catalina on our boat. 

My first sail trip was before I could walk and it was love at first sight because I still can't get enough - the open sea, smell of salty air and dreamy waves enchant me still. (This is assuming I can remember my first trip when I was merely one.) Here are a few photos of the last strings of summer spent on our boat.

last, but not least, Hermie, who we found on the ocean floor, not the beach.

crisp change

The weather and I became friends again today. After walking outdoors and not feeling as though I needed to strip in the heat California has bore the past months, I figured it was time to make amends. 

The crisp cool air of Fall finally whispered against my skin and I was able to breathe freshly, leave summer behind and let go of unfinished plans. The holiday season is on its way and with it, pumpkin breads, spice cakes and caramel apple cider. And of course, friendly gatherings. 

I'm not one for change. I don't handle it well. However, when the world changes its climate, I'm some how more open to align myself with the winds and accept whatever transition comes. September was full, too full really. It burst with transition. 

Transition at work, home and oh yes, becoming a student again. 

Although, I'm still adjusting to life with homework and friends in other places, the crisp winds of Fall make me feel as though everything will be all right. And there is only joy and peace to come. 

absence

I've been absent. Just a little too long.

 September was a busy month and therefore I was a busy bee. I have a lot to tell, but for now:

 I am excited to be re-entering the blogosphere. 

I've missed you. 

(if that's physically possible).

(i think it is).

the Ws: my mamma made it

With my old/new found love of sewing, I was extremely excited when I found out my friend Alyssa took up sewing recently. Which means, another sewer to share resources with (although I'm not really sure what I've shared with her, except excitement.) Well, to make this a shorter story, she blogged about the blog "My Mamma Made it!"  and I love it! Voici this week's W! 

What I love about the author, Alexis, of the blog and the blog itself , is though she has quite a few readers and does custom orders, the blog is not a business or for publicity, it is just a really great resource that she has created. A resource for other sewers - people like me, who don't exactly know what they're doing yet or just want fun ideas. 

A portion of her blog is new designs she has created, however, a large portion is posts on "refashions." In other words, she takes old clothes she already owns and then adds or tailors them into new fashionable pieces. Can you say fabulous? 

One of the best things about the blog is that she loves Anthropologie, which means lots of cute clothes with Anthro inspired style, which means my kind of clothes. If you don't like sewing, at least check out how amazing some of her ideas are and be inspired to do something else crafty! 

Sew fun! 

french...check!?!

In Junior High, at the start of each trimester we would turn in our top three choices for electives and then the school would choose which class we took. My top three choices were French, Industrial Tech., and then Spanish. Spanish was my last choice. It was more to make my parents happy if anything, since as they said, it was useful. 

So of course, first semester, I did my time. I was placed in Spanish class. You would have thought it was the death of me at the time. I had an entire three to four months of Spanish, but I think I remember maybe two words from the class — the ones I knew before I took the course. 

The next semester I was placed in Industrial Tech. Although I loved the course, I was starting to fear I would never be able to take Intro. to French, meaning I wouldn't be able to spend the next full year in French 1, losing my chances of taking French 2 freshman year of high school. Well, to my avail after a fun few months of "playing with the boys" in Industrial Tech., I finally met my destiny third trimester.  

To my relief, I went on to take French 1 in eighth grade and French 2 my freshman year of high school, continuing to French 4 my junior year. Well, here I am, ten years later, and I'm still placing "French" as one of "my options." 

I made it to France my junior year through Biola's art department after years of wondering if I'd ever make it. Now, I'm wondering when I'll make it back. I keep selecting France as one of my options. I looked for jobs in Paris after college to no avail. And now, I'm starting Grad. School, which again closes the French doors for a while longer. But one day, I really hope, I'll be able to check France off as a place I've lived. For now, I'd like to take sewing, arts & crafts, and oh yes, French please! 

the Ws: sunset

So I completely missed the Ws last week, so in an effort to make up for the mishap, here is a "W" on a Monday. Although, today's website isn't necessarily something you have never heard of, I think it may be overlooked. And it highlighted my last week, lots. 

Without further ado, I welcome you to explore Sunset magazine's website: Sunset. Although, you may already read the magazine, you can find most of the same content online, and look forward to new content daily. If you don't read the magazine, here is a little taste. The magazine outlines "how to live in the West." Think coastal vacations, beach side meals and outdoor party ideas — a.k.a. delicious. 

So if you live in the "East," this may not sound like the best W for you, but it is chock-full of delicious recipes, places to travel and other things you can obviously still do in the East, like decorate.  

And of course, what you can do everywhere: cook. (which is the part that highlighted most of my last week.) Although, I was extremely busy, I was on a cooking kick. So I printed off some of Sunset's most recent recipes and started cooking. Sunset has easy, delicious recipes that are perfect for the end of summer right now. I would suggest trying their marinated, heirloom tomato salad and their huckleberry cobbler.

I love their travel section since it is geared towards the West,obviously, it is a great resource if you want a vacation, but don't have the resources for a full week's vaca. I've never been to Yosemite, so I'm hoping to use their one-day Yosemite guide soon and I'm actually going to their number one hideaway by the sea in a month's time. 

Also, I plan on using their 4 foot veggie guide to make myself a veggie garden as well. So if you are like me and don't have a lot of space, this may be your perfect quench to gardening in a small space. 

So with that, this week's W is delightful in multiple ways and the perfect companion if you are a Westerner...or want to be one. 

Go Explore!

the Ws: smitten kitchen

So you may have seen today's W website previously on my blog, however, it is too good to not include in part of the Ws series. And that is Smitten Kitchen. If you are the least bit interested in cooking, delicious easy-to-find ingredients and surprising tastes, you will like Smitten Kitchen. 

From the basic, but most delicious cinnamon buns to the perfect recipe for hamburger buns, Deb updates her blog like website with new recipes every few days only to reader's happiness. Cooking from her tiny kitchen, she tells small tales of how she came to find the current recipe du jour and her husband Alex photographs the loveliness of it all. 

Smitten Kitchen is a wonderful website to find new and interesting recipes to spice up your life — your eating life in particular. One of her newest recipes that I am dying to try is her peach cupcakes with brown sugar frosting. I'll let you know how that goes when I attempt to make them! 

Until then, have fun cooking (or at least looking) with the Smitten Kitchen!

Bon Appetit!